Updates on Life and Experimentation
This blog post wasn’t planned. I was actually sitting down to write a completely different article for another online publication, but the words weren’t flowing.
I had set myself a precise schedule for May, I wanted to show up every week with a set of tasks to work on my coaching business that it’s my main focus at the moment. But even If I had the time, I felt deeply uninspired and unmotivated, although all the things on my list were cool and they basically are what I love to do.
As I shared in this post , I feel stuck and in a funk, things aren’t flowing and I honestly never expected it would happen to me.
I had heard in the past concepts like writer’s block, or being creatively dry, but they all were foreign to me because I was the girl always having lots of ideas, maybe lacking some courage to take action but definitely not lacking imagination.
Until I found myself only 3 short weeks into my “plan” and feeling empty and unexcited about it all.
I started to question everything I was doing, If having this blog even made sense, if the way I’m spending my time is actually serving me and the things I used to love a couple of years ago are still making me vibrate!
So I went back to look at the meaning of “finding your inner light”, the piece I wrote to describe the purpose of this blog almost two years ago now, and I suddenly realized that it all makes so much sense.
At the time I wrote:
“Follow your inner light is a movement, a lifestyle which is based on living from your heart, guided by your intuition, by that gut feeling that whispers what’s really best for you but that we’re so used to ignore to listen instead to the fear-based beliefs and stress in our heads.
We live in a society that too often proclaims busyness and distractions as normal and even cool, and force us to make choices based on fears and self-doubt .
It gives us the illusion that if we follow a perfectly straight path, if we manage to fit into a box about the perfect career, partner, money, children, power….than we will have gained our right to happiness and satisfaction.
But I believe life is an experiment.
Your own personal experiment, and that we have the freedom to follow the daily calls of what makes us feel good, what light us up trying out new things, and that mistakes do not exist but only learning experiences to help us grow out of our comfort zone.
I also believe that you can craft your own definition of success and happiness, regardless of what is your profession, level of fame, how much money you earn or how many designer bags you own. It’s all up to you and how you can live your truth everyday.
It takes a lot of courage to live from your heart, but I feel that when we start living a bold life, embracing your vulnerability and weirdness, incredible opportunities open to us and we connect with each other on a much deeper level, we feel true love and we understand that at the end we really are all one.”
Reading back these words was such a great reminder for me, and they still totally resonate with my life.
My life is still a complete experiment, and it’s ok if there are parts of it that are wearing out, that are not as shiny and exciting as they were before.
I still believe that the beauty of my journey is having created the freedom for me to wake up in the morning and ask myself : What do you choose to do today? Does what I was doing yesterday still lights me up?
I remember some time ago a friend told me a story of a couple getting married and how the wedding vows the man wrote went something like this :
“I promise I will never get to know you”
And all the people in the ceremony were so surprised to hear that, why he didn’t want to get to know his wife?
But what he truly meant was that he wanted to choose and and discover who she was every day.
That he was giving her the freedom to grow and evolve and accept that she wouldn’t be the same person years from now, because that’s what people do, they change, grow and evolve.
And that’s how I want to feel my relationship with my career to be. An ever evolving love story in which I’m not asking my job to forever be the same.
I will keep on listening to the nudges of my inner light every time it wants to evolve in a different and unexpected way.
So this is one of that moments.
Things are shifting again and I’m not forcing them to stay the same, just because it rationally makes sense, or because it’s more comfortable like that.
I’m on the edge of something new, I created an empty space and I still don’t know what it’s going to fulfil it.
It’s the space in between inspiration and new creations, and even If it’s very scary, I’m building up my muscle and it feels exciting !
What I know for sure it’s that new opportunities are coming my way and I’m surrendering to them by :
Dropping the tight schedule that it’s just stressing me out
And letting myself write posts like that instead of what I had “planned” to talk about
Accepting not to have the answers I want yet
Going back to basics in my self-care, by cooking more healthy food and sleeping early regularly
Following the flow of what I want to do in the day, even if it doesn’t feel like a big wave of inspiration yet
Getting more busy doing simple work that feels good in the moment and helps me create momentum ( working on this one right now..)
Eye candy activities like visiting galleries, reading amazing books, watching movies and having soft conversations with new like-minded friends
If you have read all the way to here, first of all thank you so much, you’re an awesome human being !! And you’ve been experiencing something similar, I’d love to hear your story or comments below, I’m with you on this path !